金融危機下新版魔鬼金融字典

如果你有創意，可以找一些域名出來

6 m+ `- V; P  r1.The problem with investment bank balance sheets is that..."on the left side, nothing is right. On the right, nothing is left."
/ n- e" e7 E) H9 w0 y3 d　　2.There are 30 billion prime numbers below 700billion. The rest are all subprime.
　　
　　3.How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday.
　　
　　4.For geography students: What』s the capital of Iceland? Answer: about three pounds fifty.

　　
" J+ o* {* M- Y& E1 K　　5.What』s the difference between a guy who just lost everything in Vegas and an investment banker? A tie.
　　
' R! V1 s; q) I$ O# ~! T　　6.Whats the difference between a bond and a bond trader? A bond matures, trader doesn』t.
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　　NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS . . .
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; G' D  j. H9 O6 i: o　　CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer. CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
　　
　　BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
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　　BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
　　
　　VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
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　　P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
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' _& v% U' M' c8 Y0 G( W, {4 a4 U　　BROKER -- What my broker has made me.
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' t* x: I8 B* ?: P　　STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.
　　
. d& q  S1 Z( w$ V6 H　　STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
　　
( i# v  @: j$ C+ y6 T5 t5 F/ b　　STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
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　　FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
　　
6 c: o2 N2 v; _( T  t$ u　　MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.
　　
: x) O- D9 L, q! ?) w8 m/ s　　CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
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　　YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
　　
" }' q# P% q2 j' k　　WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you』re the sucker who bought Yahoo@ $240 per share. INSTITUTIONAL
　　
　　INVESTOR -- Past year investor who』s now locked up in ant house.
　　
　　PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.

學習了，~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

不錯，有些新思路