如果你有創意,可以找一些域名出來% T' O( G# w; o1 T5 W# z A
1 s5 h8 e( u5 `5 \1.The problem with investment bank balance sheets is that..."on the left side, nothing is right. On the right, nothing is left."
; q' A9 T+ e3 o! l! v" G9 {( ^ 2.There are 30 billion prime numbers below 700billion. The rest are all subprime.
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1 K# a8 f2 f8 f# O- ` 3.How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday. ) j; s* b# m3 T( s. h
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4.For geography students: What』s the capital of Iceland? Answer: about three pounds fifty.6 g0 O& x0 }9 X' [2 }
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5.What』s the difference between a guy who just lost everything in Vegas and an investment banker? A tie. / A$ {/ i; r# Q2 V
- K% q b' K" G. U5 G# {5 x 6.Whats the difference between a bond and a bond trader? A bond matures, trader doesn』t.
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NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS . . .
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CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer. CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
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3 x; w# s: P! ?/ Q9 v1 @ BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
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BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex. 4 T6 q- y: V1 D* A7 a5 u
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VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
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1 L' P* \( t( P( F P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing. . f% x' a$ ^6 j7 d8 I2 m9 q
( S0 ]- J# B: P7 @$ W3 _% x BROKER -- What my broker has made me.
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W3 O+ v) a# C, ^& Y STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell. 5 Y7 B0 Y' R4 o: a; Y5 c& q
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STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock. . a4 k$ E$ ^" G0 E; Q
% E6 o' g- ]6 h) d& m' a0 v STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves. ' Z; z' F0 Z2 y( |3 D; w
6 i5 v6 O9 P& n6 `& o. G FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
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MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks. ( [% `9 d5 W& X/ o% D2 N
w) y7 L/ A5 t1 H; R0 e CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet. 1 X& h5 F7 w K* I1 T& a. o4 [' T
. j- x, b5 h6 ?( | o+ e+ S) T YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share. ) U% {* X) c3 F6 l
1 n1 E! C1 o! [& R) l+ f& N WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you』re the sucker who bought Yahoo@ $240 per share. INSTITUTIONAL
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INVESTOR -- Past year investor who』s now locked up in ant house. ) w' x* s1 I* G) T) [5 Q
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PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use. |
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